 |
#1
Democracy Manifest
A true politician, you have played all sides - an authoritarian libertarian, and a socialist capitalist.
|
|
 |
#2
Cult Of Personality
The dictionary definition of personality is a picture of YOU!
|
|
 |
#3
Coalition Kid
Absolute power may corrupt absolutely, but it’s easier than leading a coalition government twice.
|
|
 |
#4
Living In The Future
High speed internet, High technology, a decent space program and driverless cars.
|
|
 |
#5
Taxahontas
If it moves, tax it!
|
|
 |
#6
Everybody Out!
Everybody out! Literally in this case, strikes everywhere.
|
|
 |
#7
Dangerous Streets
You will know my name by my trail of astronomically high crime figures
|
|
 |
#8
Heir to Ayn Rand
A rising tide lifts all the super yachts in the harbour…but also submerges the smaller vessels.
|
|
 |
#9
Ecotopia
You have become a true hero of the environmental movement, expect a statue made of recycled plastic.
|
|
 |
#10
Wrapped In The Flag
50% of our country is now draped in, in the shadow of, or actually made from flags.
|
|
 |
#11
Bulletproof Politics
It’s astonishing how many times an assassin's bullet has failed to achieve its objective.
|
|
 |
#12
Intergalactic Socialism
Bust out the cosmonaut outfits, this socialist utopia is going into orbit.
|
|
 |
#13
Academic Paradise
People use terms like 'technocracy' to describe your efforts to build a super educated population.
|
|
 |
#14
Ignorance Is Bliss
Congratulations, here’s your reward for winning the race for the intellectual bottom.
|
|
 |
#15
Food! Drugs! Alcohol!
Our citizens do enjoy a bit of the good stuff these days, be it alcohol, tobacco, or just donuts.
|
|
 |
#16
Apocalypse Now
Food and water are in short supply, but I’ll tell you what isn't. Violent gangs and violent storms.
|
|
 |
#17
Festival Of Firearms
We now have more guns in the country than we do dogs, cats, people and birds combined.
|
|
 |
#18
The All Seeing State
Obviously only people who have something to hide have any real reason to fear the gaze of the state.
|
|
 |
#19
Squeeze The Rich
The rich may not be cuddly, but we still enjoy giving them a darned good squeeze now and then.
|
|
 |
#20
Subsidy Sam
If you want to get something done, you subsidize it.
|
|
 |
#21
Infrastructure Addict
Transport is bigger and better! Space program is bigger and better! Prisons are bigger and better!
|
|
 |
#22
No Salad Left Behind
You can judge a society by what they eat, our society is as healthy as they come.
|
|
 |
#23
Workers Wonderland
Short hours, high wages and agreeable working practices make this a paradise for people in work!
|
|
 |
#24
Top Marx
We have built a socialist paradise on earth, mostly by banning anything that looks too capitalist.
|
|
 |
#25
Start Your Engines
What do we want? CARS! When do we want them? CARS!
|
|
 |
#26
Anything Goes
We’ve developed a reputation of being a wild west where anybody can do anything they like.
|
|
 |
#27
Praise The Lord
Praise the lord! For our country has truly achieved heights of impressive piety.
|
|
 |
#28
Silicon Paradise
The geek shall inherit the earth! Or make everyday life quite difficult without their inventions.
|
|
 |
#29
Successful Liar
Your reluctance to stick to manifesto pledges is something of vote winner. Congratulations, I guess.
|
|
 |
#30
Strong Arm Of The Law
Strong on crime, strong on the causes of crime.
|
|
 |
#31
Secret State
Who are we to tell you what to do? Oh, that's right we're a brutal, authoritarian regime.
|
|
 |
#32
Healthy Living
A healthy nation, is a happy and productive nation (probably).
|
|
 |
#33
Gravedigging Boom
Son, if you want to make money these days I have just one word for you: Gravedigging.
|
|
 |
#34
Spotlight Junkie
Could you spend 5 minutes away from every media platform to just run the country? Please?!?
|
|
 |
#35
Children Are Our Future
You truly believe that future generations should have things better off than those that came before.
|
|
 |
#36
Rural Tranquility
Our cities may stink, but everyone agrees the rural parts of our country are a great place to be!
|
|
 |
#37
United Nations
Our country is at the nexus of international agreement and has a reputation second to none.
|
|
 |
#38
Shuffle-Meister
Do all of your ministerial offices come with revolving doors fitted as standard?
|
|
 |
#39
Lonely At The Top
Just keep saying to yourself “Winners don’t quit” and add them to the autobiography hit list.
|
|
 |
#40
Margin Of Error
When we said "Enjoy governing with that wafer thin majority" it was sarcasm, not a credo.
|
|
 |
#41
Viva La Revolution
They said a socialist paradise could not be built, but we have built it here together!
|
|
